I like the idea you start of with. I like the pattern and the detuned off cilter tone off it. The the thing I really wanted to see was some more development of the song. You brought some interesting stuff with some ambience in the back ground to won leading into a new melody, however, it doesn't feel like pushed it far enough and is missing farther development it could have had. This piece work for its purpose and function to set the tone of a scene, depending on what you want for your game.